You’re right. It is too early to be blogging about Valentine’s Day. But in my defense, no sooner were December holiday goods whisked off the shelves than a rosy explosion of hearts took their place. It’s like Christmas now comes with a Valentine’s chaser. We get a good, long five or six weeks to contemplate the state of our love lives (oh joy!) and consume several pounds of chocolate. One way or another it’s a holiday that’s destined to make some of us feel bad about ourselves, single or married. What romantic feeling could possibly live up to the day’s besotted expectations? And, frankly, any holiday that’s had the word “massacre” tagged onto the end of it should probably be avoided altogether. At this point, like turning 50, I just want to get it over with.

A Brief History of (Valen)tine

One theory as to how the whole distressing day started has to do with an ancient Roman fertility festival. Young women placed their names in an urn, then young men would take turns selecting a name to be paired with. Apparently the two of them would be “in lerf” for the rest of the year. Yes, hard to believe, but Valentine’s Day started out as a kind of secret Santa thing. Then there was St. Valentine who, supposedly, while incarcerated and awaiting death wrote a goodbye letter to his jailer’s daughter and signed it, “Your Valentine.” The rest is greeting card history. Makes you wonder what would’ve happened had his name been “Spatula” or “Festering.”

Yes, Some of You Will Be Celebrating

But if you must celebrate Valentine’s Day, if you must go out, I suppose you must also have a killer dress to go out in. And what better look (and at what better price) than a $49 dazzler that’s also an Oprah pick! This Ellavie dress is a blazingly cheerful color and has rather elegantly handled gathering that creates enough drape to hide bulges. I also really like the front and back V-neck so you look sexy coming and going. I hate it when designers do nothing with the back of a garment (unless there’s nothing on the front). And let’s face it: if the date doesn’t work out, you’ve only spent 49 bucks on a dress you can wear outside of V-day. And if it does work out, you’ve established a wise and admirable pattern of thriftiness, which is always a good basis for building a lasting relationship.